http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ Daily Kitten Chat Forum Topic: I'm losing my Roo en Tue, 14 Feb 2012 15:57:11 +0000 http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/8#post-106529 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 19:28:13 +0000 artistabobbi TX 1/17 106529@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>Thank you Emma. Nicely said. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/8#post-106520 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 19:22:52 +0000 Emma 106520@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>Dear loves, please let's be kind to each other. </p> <p>Whenever we have to deal with life and death directly, it is extremely difficult. Whatever decision is made, we will agonize. And this is not the time to say whose opinion is best. We are all individually responsible for our own households. We make our own decisions and we live with them, and because we are honorable people, we do the best we can with what we've got.</p> <p>I understand both positions. My husband's living will stipulated he wish that ALL methods be used to keep him alive. And all methods were used, because those were his wishes. God took him gently from me, and I still grieve for his passing. </p> <p>With animals, we cannot always understand their wishes, so we try to be responsible and compassionate pet owners. Sometimes we can give them a peaceful leave-taking without any intervention. Other times, we do something to stop a torment that will continue and will grow worse unless we do something.</p> <p>Death is different for humans and our pets. With humans, our free will and our knowledge of possibilities come into play. However, animals run more on instinct and living in the present, and we have to make the calls for them and talk to God while we do it.</p> <p>And that right there is the hell of it. No matter what we do, we always feel as though we could have done better.</p> <p>We cannot stay the hand of death. </p> <p>And right now I am holding Vicki and CatRancher and Roo and HM and KW and Ann and Shelley and Bobbi and Eileen and Instinct and all of you close, close to me. We're all hurting right now. Let's all be very kind to each other. Let's remember that we do love each other.</p> <p>For dear loves, at the end of the day, all we have is each other and God. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/8#post-106481 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 19:00:42 +0000 Kitten Whisperer 106481@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>Thank you for sharing your story, Ailuromaniac. You love for your three kits who crossed the bridge shines through your words.</p> <p>Shelley, thank you for your words of wisdom. There is room here for all kinds of beliefs and for those who do not believe in a higher power. What is most important is that we support each other through very painful moments like these.</p> <p>Great Dane started another thread for CatRancher and Boo. Let's go there for additional posts. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/8#post-106357 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 17:56:50 +0000 SammyandOliversmama 106357@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>Yes, CR, we love you and support you. God Bless. .. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/8#post-106304 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 17:00:15 +0000 rainingwolf 106304@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>MCW wrote: "Sometimes it's better to say nothing". Vicki, take a hint. Enough. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/8#post-106284 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 16:33:36 +0000 MaryLynnVa 106284@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>CatRancher, I think it's all been said, I wish there was something I could add... {{HUGS}} </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/8#post-106282 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 16:33:27 +0000 Buttercup 106282@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>that's beautiful Eileen. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/8#post-106281 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 16:33:13 +0000 2 Popoki 106281@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>Eileen... *wipes away tears* that is beautiful! </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/8#post-106273 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 16:26:44 +0000 feral 106273@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>Eileen...that is so heart-warming. What a beautiful thing to write. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/8#post-106269 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 16:22:54 +0000 Leeny 106269@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>I've just now read this thread, and by this time, I suppose Roo has gone to the Bridge. CatRancher, share the peace and joy that Roo feels now that he has reached "furball heaven" where "it won't hurt any more," as MCW put it. You stopped his pain even though it hurt you, and that is a very kind and loving thing to do.</p> <p>Creator God, on the sixth day You formed the land-dwelling animals and human beings. You gave to humanity the responsibility of caring for the creatures You made and brought them before Adam to see what he would call them. Today we come before You to give thanks for the life of Your creature whom we have called by name, Roo. We ask Your comfort for CatRancher's sorrow at the end of Roo's life, and entrust him to Your eternal love. (From the funeral service I wrote for my furbabies.) </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/8#post-106258 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 16:18:27 +0000 anncetera2 106258@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>CR, you and Roo are in my thoughts and prayers; my heart goes out to you. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/8#post-106229 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 15:41:20 +0000 SylvesterMiasMomma 106229@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>God bless you CatRancher for making the right decision for Roo. St. Francis will be with you at the moment you help Roo to the bridge. Hugs, prayers and purrs. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106224 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 15:38:40 +0000 artistabobbi TX 1/17 106224@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>CR, I have been on both sides of this coin - taking my loved one in for euthanasia, or, worse, sending my baby with my daughter, and letting her hold MY baby while he died. I have to live with that.<br /> I also allowed "nature to take it's course", and I can still see my little boy fighting for his breath as he lay dying. And I have to live with that, too.<br /> I am with you and Roo, in spirit, in grief, and in love.<br /> Peace, hugs and purrs. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106221 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 15:35:33 +0000 Tigerlilly 106221@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>May all of our long distance prayers comfort you today. Thinking of you and Roo. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106216 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 15:31:38 +0000 Bellantara 106216@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>My prayers are with you as well. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106204 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 15:26:08 +0000 AZDEBRA 5/27 & crew 106204@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>CatRancher, you and Roo both are in my thoughts today, there are many who will greet him and guide him over that bridge. And with you there to ease the way, how could it not be peaceful. We all will understand if you aren't feeling up to coming on-line tonight, take time for you and memories and the rush of feelings that will come. Bless you for caring and loving Roo &gt;^..^&lt; </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106196 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 15:19:47 +0000 rainingwolf 106196@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>I have to say I am so grateful to live in Oregon where we have made physician assisted suicide legal. It's very comforting to know that when my vent no longer does it's work properly that my husband will not have to see me gasping and painfully trying to take a breath. I expect that day to be a long time away, but at least there will be no "let God decide" crap to prolong the suffering. We should be at least as kind to our loved ones as we are to our animals.<br /> Catrancher, my purrayers are with you and your little Roo--bless you for being his compassionate caretaker. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106193 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 15:18:32 +0000 Instinct 106193@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>Bless you CatRancher for being smarter and more compassionate than may I have encountered in my travels. I will always be here for you if you ever need anything.</p> <p>Mark </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106189 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 15:15:55 +0000 CatRancher 106189@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>Thanks to all. I will try to write tonight after Roo has passed, but don't know if I will be able. This does bring back memories of my Mother's passing. She was in hospice care and she was in CHF and her days were limited. The transfusion was provided to make her last days more comfortable. But my sister, who has been a nurse for 35 years thought was worried that the transfusion would cause more fluid to build up around her heart, it takes a while to resorb. She kept fretting about how fast they were pumping it into her. The nursing staff checked her vitals before, during and after, and she had no signs of distress...everything was ok. It was when we were driving her back to the nursing home that she started having difficulty breathing. We rolled down the window and she was gasping for breath. We got her into the room and they started to work on her right away, but it was too late. She took a few last gasps and was gone. Death, in my Mother's case, was not peaceful...nor as they say "pretty." I held her hand all night just one month prior when we thought that would be her last night. I prayed and comforted her and she said she was afraid. I told her I wouldn't leave her and I didn't and she rallied the next morning and didn't remember a thing. God bless the dementia. I did remember though. Anyway, my sister and I know intellectually that we were not responsible for her death and that her time was short. It was just that couldn't help her at the end...even with all our planning and good intentions and love...it was what it was. I'm NOT playing God with Roo...but, maybe selfishly, I am allowing him to go in peace and not fighting for his last breath. I know how it works, I have euthanized one other kitty, my Freud, 6 years ago and I was with him at the end. He was 21 years old and had a stroke. What I'm trying to say is that I'm not ignorant about death and the process of dying...in humans and in animals, and so this is not a decision that I made based on someone else's opinion or experience but rather based, very intimately on my own and my loved ones' experiences. </p> <p>I can't say enough how much I appreciate all of you who have shared your painful good-byes with me, offered your understanding of this difficult time, and gave freely of your hugs and prayers. The hugs may be "virtual" hugs, but the prayers are always in real time... Love to you all... </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106185 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 15:12:06 +0000 feral 106185@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>CatRancher...I've thought of you &#38; Roo all day &#38; want to add to the others as well that you ARE doing the right thing for Roo. May she have a peaceful passing. And my babies will also meet her at the bridge. I must say they're all a pretty good bunch &#38; they can't go wrong with Chester at their sides. {{{HUGS}}} </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106184 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 15:11:31 +0000 MeezerMama in OK; 10/23 106184@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>CR-what you are doing for Roo is the kindest most wonderful thing you can do. It breaks my heart when I see that someone is waiting too long to make the decision you have made. It is very obviously done out of love. Thank you for preventing the suffering that would come from his condition. It is selfish to prolong our friend's suffering only because we can't bear to let them go. The kind, and yes I believe Christian, thing to do is gently help them cross the bridge. God made us their caregivers and this is our final and most important obligation to fulfill for our beloved pets. Vicki-I don't know what prompted you to post as you did, but don't credit God with human venom. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106135 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 14:26:24 +0000 WillowandWindismom 106135@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>CatRancher, I must add one more thing. Please don't let your grief over Roo bring back grief and possibly feelings of guilt over your mother's death. The hardest thing for me to learn in nursing was that we simply can't fix everything. We had a very wise vet who told me once when we had to have a precious kitty euthanized "Well, my old daddy always said 'Ain't none of us going to get out of this thing alive'." As "Texas" as that was, I always remembered it when I was doing hospice nursing. Every day I would tell myself "Just do the very best that you can for your patients. No one can expect more." Sometimes we are guided by what physicians tell us because we really must place our trust in them. You did nothing wrong by choosing to try the blood transfusion for your mother. After all, it offered a chance. And that would not have been what lead to her death. It sounds rather like severe CHF or pulmonary edema and sometimes we really do have to admit that we can't fix it. But my heart aches for you that you carry that burden and I know that your mom wouldn't want you to do that. </p> <p>As hard as the decision was for Roo, you are doing the right thing. And you have had a weekend with him, as well as a life with him, to tell him how much you love him. I'm sure that you had that with your mother, too. CR, look at that as a precious gift. My mother was killed in a freak accident. One moment she was there and then gone and I wasn't there. I never got to say goodbye. Roo knows that you love him. And you need to know that we love you. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106121 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 14:10:20 +0000 Buttercup 106121@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>Sam and the rest of my babies will be waiting to gently nuzzle him and show him the warm places to rest. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106120 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 14:07:44 +0000 SammyandOliversmama 106120@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>Hootie is going to watch for Roo with HM's Sebastian ... ((Hugs and prayers) </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106119 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 14:01:50 +0000 HuddysMama 106119@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>CR, I 'told' Sebastian last night to look out for Roo and show him around. ((Hugs and prayers)). </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106117 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 14:01:02 +0000 NNGM 106117@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>I've been thinking about you all day, CatRancher. Please don't let anyone make you question yourself. You are right: You are Roo's caretaker, and only you can make the right decision. You know what is best for your baby. I'm sending many {{{HUGS}} your way and I hope Roo's passing will be a gentle and painless one. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106101 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 13:30:08 +0000 SammyandOliversmama 106101@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>{{{Hugs and Prayers}} .. Thinking of you CR and Roo .. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106100 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 13:27:13 +0000 Instinct 106100@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>I know, FH. I do certainly know. Fanatics like her tick me off "Gods decision" What a load of crap - why do we have brains if it is all "Gods decision"?? </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106099 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 13:25:50 +0000 owlwatcher_974 106099@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>CatRancher, I am so sorry for the difficult decision you have to make. I will pray that God send you peace and comfort to carry you through this. Hugs to both you and Roo.</p> <p>Vicki, I have had to make this decision for more than one of my furbabies. The worst was when it was my mom's dog that I had inherited. People kept telling me I should have her put to sleep but, knowing my mom would never choose to have one of her babies put to sleep and would always wait by the animals side caring for it diligently until it passed away, I decided not to euthanize Tinker until the very last minute. The memory of her getting worse and worse until that final night will always haunt me. By the time we finally did help her over to the rainbow bridge, she was paralyzed on the verge of death crying for help. I still regret letting the poor baby get to that point.</p> <p>I also regret having to euthanize one of my other kitties because she had gotten injured and had a broken jaw that the doctor at the emergency clinic said there was little chance of fixing. I still feel I should have at least tried.</p> <p>It all depends on the situation. In Roo's situation, while it may be heartbreaking, helping him over to the rainbow bridge is much kinder than making the poor baby suffer when there is no chance for a cure. </p> http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/topic/3616/page/7#post-106098 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 13:25:33 +0000 Rubia in CA, 4/28 106098@http://www.dailykitten.com/chat/ <p>Well said, Karenopa. I would like to think that Vicki did not intend to be mean or hurtful, and that she truly does not understand the situation that CatRancher is in right now. It is true that CatRancher really didn't need to see something like that today - this decision is so very difficult as it is. But we are all here for CR, and we will help her get through. I just hope that Vicki can learn from this as well. </p>