Lisa, I am so sorry for your loss, and so glad you have a good friend with you so you did not have to face this alone. Isn't it amazing how cats know when you are sad? I'm sure your other kitties were all there to comfort and grieve with you. My prayers are with you that your heart will ease its ache and find peace.
Daily Kitten Chat Forum » Purrs
I've Lost My Sweet Tex
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Posted 2 years ago by rainingwolf #
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*wiping the tears from her eyes at Lisa's description of seeing Tex carried away by the coyote*
Lisa,
I am so glad you weren't alone when it happened. It is difficult enough to deal with seeing something so horrible, but being alone would be far worse. Bless you friend for being there to help you through this. I will keep you in my prayers. The other kitties know and understand, and will comfort you and each other. I am so glad you have the other kitties. I will be praying for their safety... that the coyotes and other creatures that might hurt them will stay far away from them.Posted 2 years ago by owlwatcher_974 #
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I am so sorry Lisa, my thoughts and prayers are with you.
Posted 2 years ago by Lynn from PA 6/8 #
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I'm so very sorry Lisa. TDK white light surrounds you like a comforting blanket.
Posted 2 years ago by JoanfromNewJersey #
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I am catching up from the weekend. Dear dear Lisa, I am so sorry. I wish I could say something that will make you feel better. (((((Lisa)))))
Posted 2 years ago by tinafishfrombirthplaceofElvis #
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{{{{{LISA}}} I am so sorry--how awful, but at least you know he is not hurt somewhere needing help and suffering. Take comfort.
Posted 2 years ago by Sheba's Mom in Phoenix, AZ 10/8 #
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Lisa,
I am so very very sorry for your loss.... Sending white light and prayers.Posted 2 years ago by harley vixen #
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I wish I didn't feel the need to explain myself, but I don't want any of you distressed over the rest of my ferals so here goes,,,
The rest of the cats that stay outside are much, much too wild to come in. Only one of them is even curious about the house, the rest run from it. They're all females and they scatter when prey animals appear. Or they even run them off. Tex had a house cat's temperament. And he was in the house all day the night he was killed. I had just let him out for a little break because my apt. is small, and we were bringing in all of Charlotte's luggage, upsetting CJ and Misty, and had the door wide open anyway.
In the middle of all this, all his feral "sisters" were outside crying for dinner. So to lower the overall chaos level, I put him out to eat with the ferals. He had finished and was sitting in his chair taking a bath.
That is how he came to be outside when he was snatched. No, I cannot bring the others inside. I'm desperate to find homes for all of them. Emma has encourage me to post photos of them on TDK but I didn't feel I could impose on any of you to take on a half-feral pet. I recognize that they need a better home. But for now, I can't take them to the SPCA--they don't take ferals, and if I take them to the city, they'll be euthanized. I've visited the in-between shelters, and that would be dooming them to life in prison. So I believe my half-wild girls are better off with me, where they are fed, loved, get vet care. Is that a sufficient explanation for why my baby Tex was outside and why I'm not doing things different with the other outside girls? I'm too paralyzed with hurt right now to do anything different anyway.
Right now I must get well enough to go back to work, focus on getting in strong emotional shape so I can be a strong therapist and help other people, take my own focus off myself. And somehow in all this, turn my attention back to mom and Nina who are having a terrible time with Nina's shoulder broken. I should be up there with them. But now I've missed too much work. I don't have sick benefits, etc.
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Lisa, it is still a very sad day when one of our own is hurting! Not to mention when one of our "kits" is lost no matter if they are feral or otherwise. I think we have all been saddened by this. Hang in there and take care of you. Hope Nina is doing ok as well. Hugs to you!
Posted 2 years ago by mollycat71 #
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If you can, please pray for Misty and CJ. They finally had a friend to play with, and it had brought a new, fun dynamic into their world. Where will we ever find another Tex? Another Bob? My head knows he's out there waiting for us, But my heart just can't let go of my baby Tex yet. He was less than a year old, was already 16 lbs with huge feet, And the most beautiful trusting aquamarine eyes.
Occasionally I would look at him and worry--in a silly, romantic way--that he could not live long. Nothing that beautiful and innocent could last. Remember the poem "Nothing Gold Gan Stay?" I think Walt Whitman wrote it, but am not sure.
Tex's face always made me think of that poem.
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Prayers all around! I know there is a kitty cat out there waiting for you and Misty and CJ. It is sooooooooooooooo hard to let go of our furbabies no matter how old they are. I understand your pain, I think we all do. I think part of loving these creatures entirely is the pain of parting ways with them. I know your Tex is safe and went over the Rainbow Bridge with our furbabies from the past but it somehow still hurts. It seems so shallow to say time heals all but it does and Tex doesn't want you to hurt. I know he wants you to be happy. Please know as long as you need prayers and hugs me and my girls are sending them your way. Its ok and normal to be sad. ((((LISA, CJ, MISTY))))
Posted 2 years ago by mollycat71 #
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Robert Frost wrote this:
Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.I memorized that poem several years ago when the world was spinning out of control. It truly helped make everything clear and crisp again, and it restored my faith. Goethe put it another way: A thing has beauty because it perishes.
Lisa, you have the flu and sinusitis. Please follow your doctor's orders.
And please follow TDK's orders: Please go back to bed and let us manage the world while you sleep, dear friend!
Much love,
Emma -
Beautiful poem. I second Emma's motion to let us handle the world while you get some rest Lisa.
{{{Lisa, Misty, CJ}}}Posted 2 years ago by JoanfromNewJersey #
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{{{Lisa}}} I haven't been on much lately but I have been lurking. I have no words to discribe my grief for your situation. I am just grateful that you are still holding it together. I don't know if I could stay as strong as you are. Please don't let anyone make you feel that you are at fault in any way over this. You did all that you could do. Nature can just be so cruel. There is no rhyme or reason, it just is. Tex knew you loved him and he will wait for you at the bridge. Please take comfort in that.
Emma and Joan are right on. Please rest and take care of yourself. The rest of your family needs you to stay strong as only you can. Let us shoulder your burden for just a while. {{{Lisa, Misty & CJ}}}.
Posted 2 years ago by debsterwiz #
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Lisa I hope you don't think I was asking you to explain. I just didn't know your situation. I totally understand about kitties that are ferals. Susie knows how that goes, with the exception of Hopper who surprised everyone by wanting to convert to an indoor kitty, it usely won't happen. I also know that things can happen fast! BooBoo used to be an indoor/outdoor kitty too! And when we first got Blackbeard we would take him out supervised until the time he got spooked and ran into the neighbors yard with 2 pitbulls...I went to the hospital but Blackbeard (only by the Grace of God) was unharmed...That's when BooBoo became indoor only (she still manages to dart out from time to time) and I spend sometimes a half hour trying to catch her..she just go from our front yard to 1 or 2 neighbors yards but will go in a circle for a longtime making me look very silly. I know you must be devastated and I'm so sorry for your loss. Tex is at the Bridge and not in any pain. Like Deb said sometime nature is very cruel.
And please don't feel you are burdening us, that is what we are hear for...please when you can, post pictures..We may or may not be able to help but it is always worth a try. -
Lisa, I am so sorry. You are doing the best you can for your ferals and you did the best you could for Tex. It is just so sad that the coyote happened to visit that night. It was a predator obeying it's instincts, but that doesn't make it any easier. I have lifted you up in prayer and asked for Peace for you.
Posted 2 years ago by KYKAT 12 23 #
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I sent this to Lisa on Monday morning about a dream I had had the night before. At dawn I woke up with this in my head, and I wrote it down:
My dream was this:
"A snout poked through the railings, and it snatched some small creature. A yelp and a pattering of strong angry paws.
"Then, it was as though I were following a fierce wild animal through brush and trees, and the creature had something trapped within its jaws. There was no sound except the wild galloping feet and the stalks and grasses slapping at our legs. The night was so dark.
"Suddenly, a great translucent hand reached down, larger than all the trees, and scooped the creature's quarry from his mouth. The huge right hand, white and luminous, rose in the air, and the creature disappeared into the night with a shell still clenched in its jaws of what had once lived.
"I looked up, and I saw through the middle of that shining palm, a small cat, curled up in sleep.
"God's left hand moved over the little animal, and he stroked him with one mighty finger. The little cat yawned, stretched, and scrubbed his face against the palm, purring deep in his throat. His paws batted the air as he rolled on his back.
"And I heard this deep, soft chuckle, as though the universe and its maker were amused by the antics of the sweet little cat.
"Then I woke up. It seemed that the dream lasted only a handful of seconds, but it was so vivid!
"Only pets, only those animals who have known the love of mankind, cross the Bridge. And there are many Meadows, many Trees, but only one Bridge. And like everything else, it leads to the Father."
Lisa sent me an e-mail asking about my dream:
"You actually *dreamed* this!!!! When? What night???
I'm sorry, but I need to know everything about it!!!
This is something I can hold onto!!! Did God really chuckle
or did I imagine that part????"and I replied:
"I dreamed this on Sunday night, and yes, there was this
incredibly soft laugh, deep in register. I remember looking
up through the back of that hand held high above me, with
starlight shining through the hand, but not through its
contents. It was so lovely and peaceful, Lisa, and the
purrs coming from Tex were those thrumbly noises that only a
completely delighted cat can make."Sometimes we forget the vast good humor of God, and the delight He feels at the sight of His creations.
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Emma you are one of the most amazing and wonderful people ever!! This is so beautiful..I can barely see through my tears, but somehow they are tears of happiness..You have a gift and God himself has given that to you. Bless you Emma!! I can hear Gods chuckle, and Tex's content purr!!!
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I'm wiping the tears from my eyes. I understand the pain of loosing a youngster. It always seems that when I really bond with a young innocent kitten something tragic happens. Not that I am not bonded with all of my kits, but sometimes, there is one that shows up and I totally melt as they inch/wiggle their way into my heart. I know they are still in my heart and sometimes in my home I will catch a shadow of one of them out of the corner of my eye. It's going to be ok but it will take awhile and I promise there will be another that will squirm his or herself into that special place again.
Posted 2 years ago by tinafishfrombirthplaceofElvis #
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I'm so sorry for your loss lisa. Words are meaningless at a time like this, but Emma says it like no one else can.
I am sending you positive, healing energy to heal your heart and to dim the last sight you had of tex.
Peace, hugs and purrs.Posted 2 years ago by artistabobbi TX 1/17 #
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I think our hearts become open and expansive only after they've been broken. Then, everything can come in and find a home.
It is such an amazing little part of us.
And yes, Tina, like you, sometimes I catch a shadow of one of those I've loved, moving past me. Such a lovely shadow, to catch a wounded heart!
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So beautiful, Emma!
Posted 2 years ago by WillowandWindismom #
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Emma...May I adopt you,Please? You really know how to get to a person's soul. Your words are beautiful. I would like to live out my days with a spirit like yours by my side.
Lisa...I'm, again, so sorry for your loss of Tex. I know first hand, that kind of loss. And I also know your pain for the others you have no control over. The other ferals know you love them. They come daily to show their love for you. Their distance they keep is simply for purposes of protection. Please do not feel bad for not bringing them in. They weren't meant to live that way.
{{{LISA}}} {{{FURBABIES}}}
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