I just got back from the appointment, and it was different. The lawyer's office is in a downtown building that I think must have been a high-class apartment house in another life. He had to buzz me in at the front door. His office was on the second floor, which was reached via a very wide staircase. There were several hallways with many small professional offices along them. When I got up to the office, a few minutes before the appointment time, I found a sign on the lawyer's door saying he wasn't there; so, I sat on a couch beside the door--I knew he couldn't be far away because he'd just spoken to me while buzzing me into the building. He did arrive about a minute later--wearing a polo shirt, shorts, and athletic shoes with tube socks.
During the consultation, I found out that he mainly works out of his home and only rents the erstwhile walk-in closet to have a place to meet his clients. He can be easily reached because all calls are forwarded to his cell phone; he, in fact, buzzed me into the building from his cell phone while walking down the street. Because of this low overhead, the up-front payment for a divorce is $500, and the rest of the $2000 to $2500 fee is payable in installments--much more workable than the other attorneys I've consulted, though ultimately the same price.
I don't know what it was, though--the informality of the professional setting, the fact that I hadn't eaten or taken my medicines yet, my not really wanting to be there because Mr. L.'s having a good day--but something just didn't "click". I started getting a headache and feeling very anxious, and I stammered over almost everything I said. The lawyer skimmed rather than read my written narrative and seemed to give more attention to the one incident of physical violence than to the consistent pattern of verbal and psychological abuse that has gone on through the whole marriage. He even printed out a TPA form and notorized it in case I wanted to file for that (his printer jammed several times in the process and he had to spend several minutes fixing that). He also told me some things that didn't mesh with what the other lawyers said: Mr. L. might get free representation and I might have to pay him spousal support, though he didn't really go much into that. He also seemed to get the impression that Mr. L. is more disabled than he actually is, to the point of not being able to live alone without supervision, and I wasn't very good at explaining the situation.
In the end, I told him that I wasn't going to file for a TPA unless Mr. L. became physically violent again. I also told him about the three conditions of Mr. L.'s last chance and that I wanted to give him an opportunity to fulfill them before filing. He thought that was reasonable. I thanked him and left.
So, littermates, here I have a lawyer whom I could manage to pay, but with whom, for whatever reason, I felt pronouncedly uncomfortable. I have another lawyer with whom I felt very comfortable but whom I would have to pay in full in advance. Right now I just feel tired of consulting with lawyers, and I think I'm going to concentrate on getting the credit cards paid. That way I'll have a choice.
About the therapist appointment: The therapist called Mr. L. and told him that it was not acceptable for his appointment to interfere with my meeting, then rescheduled him for the next evening. Mr. L. also told me that she wants to see me alone for about 10 minutes during the appointment.
Posted 2 years ago by Leeny #
