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What do you guys think, should I be worried or mind my own business?

(16 posts)
  • Started 1 year ago by owlwatcher_974
  • Latest reply from ladysky61
  1. A friend of mine, who used to live in a small 2-bedroom apartment with her son and 5 cats, appears to be in a potentially bad situation.

    She and her adult son have moved into a larger apartment, which would have been comfortable if she had kept just the five cats, but now they have 11 cats - 5 adults, two near adults, and four kittens.

    They started out with the five cats, then she adopted - or rather was adopted by a kitten as we were leaving a grocery store. Not long after that, they took in a sweet little baby calico that was found on the property where they live. These two have become parents and they are not even full grown yet.

    Not long after they adopted the calico, they were found by another kitten who was running around alone next to a busy street. My friend knew this was too many cats as it was because she was afraid to tell me they had adopted another kitten.

    A few weeks later, the two kittens I mentioned before had a litter, and I adopted one of the babies. They still have three of the kittens and have made no attempts to find homes for them. When I asked her if they were going to keep the babies, she said she couldn't just give them to the shelter. She did say something about giving them to an animal rescue, but most of the rescues around here are full so I don't know if she is going to be able to do that. One of the kittens is already named, so I am nearly certain that they are keeping that one.

    11 cats is not too worrisome on its own - I used to have 11 and I was able to care for them. My worry is that they have one breeding pair that have not been fixed yet, one cat that has been in heat many times, and another male cat that is getting old enough to become a father. Not to mention at least two more unaltered males and possibly one female - depending upon the sexes of the three kittens from the recent litter.

    My friend keeps saying that she is going to get the cats spayed and neutered, but she has not done this yet. She has had one female going in and out of heat for over two years now. How this cat has not gotten pregnant with one unaltered male around, I will never know. My friend says that the two cats do not like each other, but I am certain that the female probably loves any other cat when she is in heat.

    My concern is that my friend already has a potential kitten factory that she keeps making excuses not to deal with, and when the three kittens grow up, there will be more breeding pairs that will create more breeding pairs.

    So far there has been only one litter, but I am wondering what - if anything - should I do? Should I just keep my mouth shut and mind my own business? Am I getting worried about nothing? Or am I seeing the beginnings of a potentially bad situation?

    Posted 1 year ago by owlwatcher_974 #

  2. she's going to be p**** regardless of what you say, or how nicely you try to say it. Her being reluctant to tell you about getting another cat indicates she knows what your views are and that you wouldnt approve of her situation.

    I wonder if its possible to estimate how much money one spends on a cat in its lifetime? We have 8 cats, and we love them dearly, but its too many. We could really use the money we have to spend on them elsewhere. If i knew it was going to be this hard caring for them all (from a financial point of view), i would never have taken in so many.

    Maybe if your friend realises the long term financial implications of caring for so many cats, she'll realise that even with the best intentions in the world, its not always possible.

    Posted 1 year ago by Skyron #

  3. I suspect it's the financial implications of spaying/neutering that is the problem. I think what I would do (and risk p***ing her off) is say, look, this has got to be hard, thinking about desexing so many cats, why don't I look into low-cost clinics for you? She might really appreciate someone else helping with the burden -- I'm not talking financially as I know you're not Rockefeller either -- but just in problem-solving when this has got to be a real financial burden for her.

    Posted 1 year ago by jcat #

  4. The money is not the problem - she has a lot of money that her landlord owes her and keeps in account for her. There is a low cost clinic in town that will give shots and alter the cats for under $65 each for females and even less for males. She just keeps putting it off using work as an excuse or saying that her landlord is busy and cannot take her to the clinic or some other excuse.

    Posted 1 year ago by owlwatcher_974 #

  5. Oh, really? Then I think I, being the busybody that I am, would offer to take the cats in for her, one by one, and hit her up for an expensive dinner out when I was all done.

    If she comes up with a reason not to do that, then I think she may be developing a hoarding problem and that's a mental health issue.

    What does her adult son think about the situation?

    Posted 1 year ago by jcat #

  6. The cats don't seem to bother him, it seems like they are just part of the household to him.

    As far as taking the animals in for her, I might offer to let her come with me when I take Cassie in. I still have to call and see if there is a waiting list at the low-cost clinic or if it is walk-in.

    Oh, did I mention that these cats are all indoor only, and that the house is a small, two bedroom house that isn't much bigger than the apartment they moved out of.

    Posted 1 year ago by owlwatcher_974 #

  7. I hate to be the rat in the corn...BUT>>> two words

    Anonymous Tip

    Something is going wrong in that household and both your friends and the kitties need help.

    Posted 1 year ago by ailuromaniac #

  8. Don't offer to take the cats in for spaying/neutering. Just tell her that you will be there on whatever day, at whatever time, with an extra carrier and she needs to be ready to go with you then.

    If you leave it up to her to call you, it won't happen. Just tell her when you want her to be standing at the door with a cat or two in her hands.

    Posted 1 year ago by CheetahBoysmommy #

  9. Tell her that cats are prolific breeders and her unaltered females could die at anytime from uterine infections and cancer. Give her the information about the clinic and offer to take them yourself. If she refuses say that you may have to call ASPCA because the cat situation is getting out of control threatening everyone's safety.

    Posted 1 year ago by ladysky61 #

  10. 1. cats breed almost as much as rabbits do...
    2. cats do not reach menopause like women do, they can breed all of their lives
    3. unaltered female cats are at higher risk for cancer
    4. the barbs on the male's penis will induce ovulation in a female cat. if they breed, it is almost guaranteed she will become pregnant
    5. one female and her mate, and all their offspring can produce 370,000 in just 7 years
    6. proper upbringing of a kitten in its first year is a minimum of $500

    "hit" her with these facts please. maybe she'll do an about face...

    Posted 1 year ago by CSBM #

  11. The reason I posted this was to get an idea of whether I was overreacting or if there was something to be genuinely concerned about. After reading the comments and suggestions, I can see that there is a serious situation at my friends house.

    I will begin by offering to help her with taking the cats in for spaying and neutering. I will also offer to help find homes for the three kittens. If she decides to keep those kittens, I won't say much as long as they are all altered.

    If help is refused, I will wait to see if she does enlist the help of her landlord - who is holding the money for her from the work she has done for him - to get the kitties down to the vet.

    Only as a last resort will I make that anonymous tip. I know and love most of those cats and do not want to see them destroyed, which is what will happen if the local (in)humane society comes to deal with the situation.

    Posted 1 year ago by owlwatcher_974 #

  12. Isn't there a limit on the number of cats she can keep when renting? I am allowed only 2, as is the case with most apartments, if they allow animals at all. This is a serious situation-she is a hoarder. Soon she will have 100 cats!

    Posted 1 year ago by Sheba's Mom in Raleigh, NC #

  13. 1) There is nothing to suggest that she is a hoarder - they have never had this many cats before, and I think that she is just overwhelmed with everything else that is going on and is having a difficult time dealing with the situation.

    2) She lives in an area where there is no limit to the number of animals she can have, but her landlord will put a stop to this long before the number goes up to 100. My worry was whether or not I should step in before the number gets to 20. After reading the other posts and the numbers and facts related to cat breeding, I see that it would be a good idea for me to do whatever I can to help with the situation rather than just sitting back and keeping my mouth shut.

    Posted 1 year ago by owlwatcher_974 #

  14. OW -- you seem do be doing real clear and careful thinking about how to interact with your friend about this. Your 3 step plan sounds good. She is not yet a hoarder. I'd worry about that if she is unable or unwilling to move forward, since emotional overwhelm that she is under could trigger hoarding.

    Again thanks for your clear and careful thinking, may your help be welcommed and all go well with your friend and the kitties.

    Posted 1 year ago by JB #

  15. oh, and spaying/neutering generally makes for a happier, mellower, more loving pet...

    Posted 1 year ago by CSBM #

  16. If she's feeling too overwhelmed, break it down for her:
    1st- Get the Female cats over 12 weeks old spayed. That'll at least keep them from getting pregnant again
    2nd-Help her find homes for the kittens. My Boyfriend works at a pet store and they often will take in kittens and adopt them out. They always get adopted really quickly. So my first thought is maybe you two could ask a pet store if they'll put them on display for a few days.
    3rd- Get the males neutered. This will help ensure harmony and no spraying! Besides if they do indeed get out, these cats could father many more kittens.
    4th- Happy cat home.

    Posted 1 year ago by ladysky61 #


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